First off, I'm 23 years old. I have goals I want to reach in my life, places I want to see, hands I want to shake, babies I want to kiss, and wild I want to run. While I will do all of these things with Justin my by side, holding my hand, cheering me on, pushing me to be better regardless of a ring or not, I'm not ready to be tied down like that. Do not get me wrong. If Justin came home tomorrow with a ring, got on one knee, and asked for my hand, I would accept without a second thought. But I'm gonna live life with or without that ring so why should be hanging on his every word and putting my life on hold until that fateful moment? I shouldn't. If you know anything about me, I insist I am a princess. And when most people think of princesses, they think about how they need to be rescued. Well this princess does not need rescuing. I am a self empowered woman in my early 20s, and I am going to concur this damn world with or without a man by my side. I will not wait for a man to start making my dreams come true because these were my dreams before any man was a figment in my mind.
And, let's not continue harping on the fact that I am living in sin. It's honestly annoying. I am no less religious living with Justin than I was living on my own, with my sister, or my parents. If anything, I am safer. We have almost every weapon known to man in our house. This also 2014, not 1900. A year ago, I had a decision to make, nay we had. I moved in with my mom when my house was sold because we were not ready for that step however we knew it was an option in the near future so I didn't sign a lease with my best friend. After 3 months of living at home, my mom, Justin, and I couldn't take it anymore. I don't say this for pity, I'm saying this because I am being honest...my mom kicked me out a week before my birthday last January where I was forced to move in with Justin. My mom wanted to control me. I was 22 years old and hadn't lived at home in years, so I was in total rebellion mode. And that constant need for control coming from my mom was causing problems with Justin and I. The best thing my mom did for all 3 of us was to kick me out. It sucked. I didn't see my mom for months after that. And I barely spoke to her. But Justin and I built an amazing relationship together in that time. Now I have a great relationship with mom nearly a year later, and I couldn't think of a better roommate even if want to punch Justin in the throat a couple times a month. But that's love!
I've been trying to leave small-town Waco since I was a kid, and something always happened to keep me from leaving. For the longest time I regretted not taking that scholarship to play tennis in Kansas, but not anymore. If I had taken that scholarship, God knows where it would have ended up, and I never would have been getting creeped on at Academy by Justin, became besties with him, made him my dance partner, made him my boyfriend, or fall in love with him. Thank God I was stuck inWaco for 5 more years than I planned!! I didn't make this move FOR Justin, if anything he made it for me, but really we made it WITH each other. Yeah, I moved 3.5 hours from home, but my grandparents, mom, step-dad, and puppy sisters are the only ones left in Waco anyways. My sister lives in Austin, my brother is in Lubbock most of the year, my dad is half-way across the world, and my aunts and uncles live elsewhere. So I really am not missing out on much.
So please, chime in with the others about whatever you please, but I won't feel bad about the decisions I've made because I am living the life I want for myself guilt-free. I appreciate the concern, but enough is enough. There is a point where it is no longer concern, and it becomes intolerance. That I shall not tolerate. So as I enjoy saying... BYE FELICIA!!
-XOXO
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